My 90 Day Media Fast: Week 1
It’s the evening before I start this 90 day journey and I’ve already watched all the videos I wanted to and listened to a few songs. All this ended at 7pm when I put away my laptop and did some reading. I’m already enjoying the silence but I know some days will be hard, however I’m feeling very positive about it all and thinking that it actually might be harder for me to get back into media once I’ve found my rhythm without it. We shall see anyway.
Searching on YouTube at the moment is such a reflex for me so that’s going to be a bit tough.
Day 1
This morning has been absolutely silent around me, but my head is so loud. So many thoughts are flying all around and I’m almost at a loss of what to do now that I’ve finished my morning Bible study.
A couple things I’ve found so far is that time is moving pretty quickly. At first I was worried that it would drag, but it turns out I’ve got a lot of things to keep me occupied.
I also noticed how loud other people are and know that that’s something I’m going to have to actively work through. I LOVE the silence but currently don’t live with others that could say the same haha.
Day 2
So far I’m not missing watching YouTube, but I kind of find myself going to my laptop and then realising I don’t have any websites to go on. I do miss listening to music when I want to sing along to something.
Day 3
Since yesterday I keep thinking that either Sabbath is approaching or that it is already Sabbath just because of how much time I’m spending with God. He revealed to me yesterday that I can turn my built in closet space into a small '“war room” (prayer closet but called war room because of the movie by the Kendrick brothers of the same name). I got so excited and began the process of clearing it out so I have space to hang my prayers to the walls. I just remembered though that I have no blue tack…
I’m also looking forward to being able to watch a sermon tomorrow so…
I was thinking though that I haven’t yet had many moments to just sit in silence doing absolutely nothing. I used to think those moments were completely important, but now I’m not so sure.
I know I’m taking a fast from all these different sources and voices, but what good can come from my own thoughts? I see nothing wrong with sitting and meditating on the thoughts of Jesus rather than my own self centred thoughts. I’m reading a book called the joy filled life where it’s based on the bible verse Philippians 4:2. I’m realising that the only way I can fulfil all those points is to focus on scripture. If I’m constantly hearing from God, then my own personal thoughts will be transformed.
Day 5
I so badly want to watch some things today. I did a night shift last night and I’ve noticed now that when I’m tired, I don’t want to read as much. I just want to sit back and watch something funny. I used to have a whole list of YouTube creators that I would go through and now I’m unable to do any of that. Even watching Christian creators, I’m not allowed until on Sabbath where I will allow maybe one or two videos, but mostly sermons.
I’ve surprised myself at how much I’m ok with not listening to any music now. I used to think that was the thing that I always wanted, but it seems I would choose to watch something over listening to a song.
Some songs that I used to think were ok have been coming to mind today that I want to research and bring to God as I’m now not sure what to think about them.
What I didn’t expect though was that I would delete the book that I LOVED. It was a book I would read at least 1-4 times a year and I was 90% through before I got convicted of the authors philosophy and knew there was no point in completing it knowing that I couldn’t accept most that was being presented. That wasn’t easy.
Day 6
I can’t remember being this bored since I was a kid. I’ve found myself napping once a day now which I rarely ever did, and yet, there’s still so many more hours in the day and it’s not even been a week yet! I’ve prayed a few times asking God what I’m supposed to do. I keep on having dreams about how I used to live with very vivid and specific things coming back to my memory as if they were actually really happening. I know that this is just a trap to make the transition to actuality even easier. It would be easy, but I’m going to hold on just for now at least.
It’s 3 minutes towards midnight and I unfortunately cave by listening to one of my favourite songs.
I guess that’s the end already but I learned so much that I’m looking forward to sharing in a separate post soon. I do also plan on restarting this fast but just without sharing my journey here as I’m disappointed that I didn’t last longer, but also proud that I was able to last more than 2 days.
✨ Nadine